August Update

It's been a busy summer for us. Paul had some Army training to do in July, I've been working a bunch at Summer Camp at the Y, & we took a fun vacation to Seattle that was joyful and relaxing.

And we also have put in a bunch of inquiries about children. Our caseworker has been sending us lots of kids to look at, some we say "not for us" to and some we say "YES! This looks interesting!"

Some of it is heartbreaking. I've taken excerpts of files to my therapist to talk about conditions that are listed on the file, to talk about "if we had this child what could we expect," it's really nice to have a professional to be able to roll ideas around with.  Adoption from the foster system is not an easy road. I can't tell you the amount of people who seem to think that we get to just walk into an orphanage and pick up a kid.

You know... like an animal shelter.

These potential children had to be REMOVED from their parents homes. Generally speaking, they are not dropped off at the state house at age 6 "hey, we don't want to be parents anymore, kthxbai."

You don't get your kids taken away from you for giving them cake for breakfast or yelling at them a couple of times. You get your kids taken away from you for abusing them, neglecting them so much that someone reports you, and you're investigated, and you're deemed to have an unsafe environment for the children to live in.

Unlike infant adoption, which is a birthmother surrendering her child often to a pre-determined family and everything seems much neater, Foster-Adoption is much more messy. No two cases will ever be the same. On the cheap end, an infant adoption is around $20,000+. Our fostered adoption will be subsidized by the state of PA, so that the children can get into a healthy home where they can become functional, productive, (and hopefully) healthy members of society.

That all being said, I am excited about the processes so far. We have our first interview with a child's caseworker next week (we don't meet the children at that interview). We'll talk to the caseworker about our lives and about the kids. There are other families being interviewed as well, but it is an opportunity to learn more about the children and be able to ask any questions that we may have. Our caseworker will be there as well, to help us make decisions about what we are comfortable with and just to be there for us. Going on our first interview is a good experience to have, even if it doesn’t end up working out in the end, so I am really excited for it.